Actions speak louder than words.

It’s obvious really, apparently Abraham Lincoln, an American President said it,sometimes I talk to People on the Internet,usually Quora, so many abuse victims believe what the abuser say, rather than their actions, they say ‘I love you’but The next day they are beating you, trying to kill you,strangle,kick us, why do we believe it...how can there be such a distance between our perceptions of the action and the words...why didn’t it immediately jump into my mind?..maybe growing up with a very strict father,and a Mum who seemed constantly stressed...and mostly never stood up for us when he was unfairly strict,I defended my kids from being hit,Jon knew that was the line he should never cross, I make decisions for my life, they don’t...but maybe in a way I controlled the relationship by setting those boundaries...?
Another thing I have noticed on Quora anyway,that most of the abused are thrown away,when the Abuser finds someone else,but that never happened to me, I alway made them leave,I find comfort in that, but then again that could be a trap of the Enemy,trying to make me prideful?

Driving 240 miles in 27 hours.

A busy weekend....that is an understatement!!!!..its helped me to come to some decisions which have been hanging over me for several months..about where as a christian i should be putting money..I had expected it to be going for one thing, when in fact it has been going to support someone who i feel, (and have proof) has not been treating others as Christ expects, in fact has been Shielding an abuser from the consequences of their actions,allowing the abuse to continue, shunning the Victim, and denying them Justice.This is Completely Un-biblical, (which i have heard myself said to the person shielding the Abuser).
The Shielder was and still is in a position of Power, over the Abusive Person,and could have stopped the Abuse but chose not too..
Yes i am judging, setting myself up as a Judge over someone else..but i am responsible to The Lord for my own actions,i WON'T aid an Abuser in any way.
I have seen those who have exposed the Abuser discredited,(again said in my presence),so i know i take that risk.The Bible says that "Evil abounds where good men stay silent"..

No response INFURIATING for Abusers!

Well here I am back on the blog after a week of trying to get back on, I was blaming google but as usual I think it was me! Of course I could use the excuse that I was not brought up with computers, like my kids, who had them at school...but it’s probably because I was impatient and didn’t read the instructions properly... I have been researching a statement by a man who sent threatening, sexual rape threats to his wife’s co worker...his most telling comment was that “I wanted to frighten her, and it was frustrating that she was not replying to the messages and I didn’t know how she was reacting to them” he said this to the Police,he was Angry because she had been in his words “not pulling her weight at work” .At the trial the court was told, she had collapsed at work, and then only had TWO days off work, before he started sending the threatening sexual text messages.

That was the year that was...Annus Horribilis

We just had our A.G.M, where is was elected Secretary again, Di the chairman gave her yearly report and said’ that was the year that was, and I never want to have one like it’... I feel the same,about C.M.A, and because of what Joe has been through...so when I saw I have only posted 6 times in the last year, I was not surprised...for a long time I couldn’t talk about anything personal because it was so upsetting...I felt that tears were just under the surface and not much would start them off...
So I guess that is why I was having chest pains, and I went to hospital, my heart is fine,they did all the tests,E.C.G and blood,I have spinal problems, and my whole rib cage has been hurting in different places for about two weeks so I will have to get that checked out...I am feeling much more positive yesterday and today,I KNOW that being close to God, praying and worshipping makes me feel better... but do I do it..NO! He forgives and is always there when I need Him, my whole being is wrapped up in Him, His ‘Rod and His staff do comfort me’i have been feeling Empty, before I knew He was always there, so I didn’t always go to Him when I had need,I felt I could do it myself, I had too many years of only having myself to depend on...but HE was always there, and has even shown me he was...When He was taking me through some of the worst memories of Abuse, so it could be dealt with, He showed me He was always there, with me and I was not there alone...He is there like that for us all, we are all His Children, I am nothing special..the Bible says ‘He is no respecter of persons’which I believe means we are all equal in His eyes, the Top Church guys are the same as the Homeless Man begging for Change..

A Trap for the Enemy,or the Enemies Trap?

I have been researching some of the Enemies devices recently...it started with finding out about local legends of the servants of the enemy,A mermaid at a pool a few miles away, a gnomes home under a Hill,I felt it was what the Lord wanted me to do,but thinking back it started with a peculiar hill at the edge of a field, which sometimes I drive past,it’s only very small,maybe30-40 feet high, and 20 feet wide,I don’t know if it’s solid rock, but maybe it must be because why hasn’t the owner flattened it? I can see it’s just a small mound, but it also looks, with ‘spiritual’ eyes like a sort of door way with turrets round,and battlements, very much like a miniature medieval castle..these images super impose themselves at the same time...and I get a warning just before we pass it every time...that it’s coming up, it’s strange because there is no where to stop near it,and the road is angled so I have to drive past quite fast, so are literally just getting one glimpse...just before we pass it I get a warning in my spirit that’s it’s coming up This is a new revelation to me, yes I can and have seen many things ‘in the spirit’but to be shown the hidden houses of the Enemy is a new puzzle to me,!
I know that he and his servants have rights over certain areas,that they have their designated areas,the Bible talks about an Angel being held back by a Prince of that territory...

Human nature being what it is...ain’t no mountain high enough, and the Drum and Monkey

My Dad had a diary, a black hard backed expensive looking book,inside he had written,"Private",and something like this is "my private Diary, please don't read it", i cant remember the exact words now, its nearly 50 years ago,but further on inside it said, but "Human nature being what it is,you are reading it"..i cant remember anything that was written down,i guess the things important to a nearly 40 year old man weren't really of much interest to a pre-teen!!.

The Diana Ross song i have put in the title, is something i cant speak about yet, without getting upset, just like seeing anything with kids on,and other stuff, which will always be painful until they come home, i get so upset i cant even type their names...i do know that God has said Joe will be a Dad to them, that they will come home,i even feel ashamed and that i am doubting God by even getting upset...but i hope He understands that pain...its so much worse to see my son in pain, than any other pain i have ever had from the bad stuff i have been through myself...but like Forrest Gump...i am not talking about that!!

Today is Jon's birthday, Ben and Joe's Dad, i reminds me when he insisted i drive out into the country, in cold and frosty weather, because it was his birthday, he wanted to go to a Country Pub,where some famous Musicians sometimes hung out...i had had a severe Asthma Attack just a few days before,may even have just come out of Hospital, i had three small children who depended on me,their Dad would not able to bring them up,So putting my life at risk would have been disaster-ous for them...So when i feel angry with Daisy..and unforgiving for putting my Grand children in Danger i should not be judging her...

Stalker

Ellie and Willow have been taken into care in Glasgow,so there is a good chance that Joe will be able to have them back, he’s got a solicitor,so it’s just a waiting game now...nothing goes fast in government departments in England....”red tape”! We are all feeing a great sense of relief, and something seems to have ‘ lifted’...
Things are awful in the Christian Motorcyclists Association inUk,there has been some bullying behaviour, by those who are high up,, and two people have been kicked out...it’s the Spirit of Jezebel,because those who were kicked out have started a ministry which people have been saved, and baptised, a reach out which is open every day...yet they were ‘shunned’ by someone, a woman, who was supposed to support them. So we have lost a brother and Sister, hopefully only for a short while, but we have people asking to join us all the time,we are the only Branch in uk that is growing, we gave out over 500,Bibles to Bikers, and 300 at the national memorial arboretum, I am not boasting it’s just a fact!
I haven’t had anymore trouble with the Ex stalker,except for some photos on Facebook..in which he looks annoyed all the time!
God is good, All the time