Groundhog Day, or groundhog life?

I have been reading a post from December 2018, i really could have been written yesterday.. a lot of my posts are like that, hence the title, my bland life,or on a negative day, my crap life!...i am a bit annoyed about how insipid i am!!!...i was so glad that Joe had a Job and i suppose after what he had been through it was pretty amazing...grudgingly given as i am still really disappointed in Joe, and i know i should not say this but alarmed at how much he is like his Dad... I thought i could see good in him,especially as he seemed to want to follow God, i know the "God thing' has worked for me He has literally brought me through the worst times of my life, and then thinking that i am probably the most abused person in the world,but giving Glory to God for bringing me through actually doesnt help me to not go down the path to pity party..i remember saying to someone that my Brother had died on Christmas day, they were completely shock and frankly appalled! Just the tip of the Iceberg , i thought if only he knew about all the other stuff! I feel marvelously brave sometimes, 'just me and God, and Ben against the world, but i am not Brave...so today to disprove these thoughts i have put my bio on Gettr...and the address of this blog! only the third time recently that i have done shared it with anybody, yes its a public blog, but its really more of an online Diary...