last minute Lisa rides again...

I really want to get back to the caravan and have Ben going through my usual problems actually getting there! when it seems like a great day to go, i wake up ill, or there's not enough money, or Ben wont get up until too late, he's getting up about 6.pm at the moment, AND as its a two hour journey, AND i hate driving in the dark it makes it hard...but this shouldn't really make a difference because the new caravan has it own built in lights! and some days everything is right to go... and i sabotage myself and cant be bothered with the aggravation of making Ben go when he hates it!...its the same with everything in my life i put stuff off, or i am ill and cant finish something in the house and its a mess...and stays that way for weeks, which is o.k until i get an unexpected visitor and feel so embarrassed about the state of the house...although i know i have said in this blog before that i am not going to beat myself up about this again, but as usual i do the Enemies job for him!!