A small thing

I am doing my testinomy at the October Bikers churh, i am not nervous, never am until about two minutes before i do it!Its funny really that people are surprised that i as a quiet person am not frightened to speak to an Audience, i remember my friends Ex husband, Tony Mcphee, a blues Musician was talking about it,he said'i can see you being able to go on stage'a nice thing to say,'he also said he wasn't nervous because he knew he was good at it,he is a brilliant guitarist! I dont think i am good at ANYTHING,any talents I have, come from God, so i am only sending them back to Him by doing His work! How can i not stand up and tell of His goodness, its a small thing compared to what He did for me! I have been reading about His death, well the start of it so far anyway, in the Gospel of Mathew,at the moment He is praying in the garden of Gethsemene,He goes back to see His friends,and three times they are sleeping,an echo i suppose of the three times Peter denied Him,so He could not rely on any Human to comfort Him, they knew what was coming, He told them many times. I have denied Him many times, just yesterday i was 'ashamed of the cross' i was wearing for a second,(a Tshirt which has the 'God so loved the world' words on it in the shape of the cross).... I am very ashamed of myself, but He always forgives.I am very un-deserving of that.