Testimony, part three.

I kept going to that Church for a few years, was Baptized in the River in August, it was still cold! but low because it had been a hot summer.I never really felt accepted in the Church, it was not in an old church building,just a meeting in an old town building,the Pastor had never been to Bible college or ordained by any religious Organization, but were real born-again believers, with a wonderful musical ministry,i felt most comfortable in Biker clothes, and all the other Women wore frilly, flowery stepford wife type dresses!!...that's fine for them, but God has not made me like that!!...I was a problem to them because i was divorced, they almost worshiped marriage,and when i go married again, despite advice not too,and Howard started to hit me they told me that it was sinful not to obey my husband and emotionally blackmailed me into staying with a violent man, i have struggled for a long time to forgive them, i felt my life was worthless to them, because he could have easily killed me.. So on very painful night after i made him leave,the Lord took me through every incident of abuse,i was that sexually molested 4 year old again, that scared and cowering 12 year old, trying to protect my brother and sister as my parents tried to kill each other, that up 15yr old beaten by my father,that Raped 27 yr old, and beaten wife twice!He showed me He was there with me i was never alone,He asked me to forgive these men,not to let the 'off the hook' as i thought, but to stop the affects of their choices, affecting my life, God is so good,He takes the 'foolish things of the world (me) to confound the wise' Doctors Counsellor's, Pyschiatrist's, Pyschologist's, none of these wise wordly people can heal the affects of abuse, only God!If you don't know Him turn to Him now, it will be the best, the best, thing you will every do! just say you are sorry for the bad stuff you have done, imagine your heart has a little door, open it for Him, ask Him to come into Your Heart and life, do it today don't go another Minute with out Him in your life, its the best advice i can give you, He is the best Gift you will ever receive, God bless you.