why does he do that?...i have no clue!!

I recently read the book by Lundy Bancroft 'why does he do that', he is a Pyshcologist who has studied and had personal contact in encounter groups with Abusers.(I found it really hard to read, the Human side of me getting angry in the first few chapters, almost wanting to toss it into the fire,but i persevered, and found it one of the most enlightening book i have ever read,( after 'women who love too much', which helped me entangle my thought process from trying to change Him,at first it seemed very Pro-abuser, by saying women were trying to control the Abuser, which really annoyed me too, but we all go through a process to get free of abuse.) In a way of course we are trying to control Abusers behaviour, FOR OUR OWN SAFETY,and of course Ultimately theirs, because they will always end up alone,'old men with broken teeth,lonely with out love',( a line from a Bob Dylan song) my last Abuser,Howard certainly is, although he tries hard not to be seen that way, by engineering a meeting with a woman, where he knew i would be. The point i am trying to get to is that Joe's Dad, Jon told me a few weeks ago that Joe spends all his money on dope, cannabis, which of course was said to upset me, which it really did and i have been angry with Joe for weeks now, which of course was what his dad Jon wanted!... so the question again why does He do that?, and as always i have no clue!!!.. was he jealous of me, being closer to Joe? answers on a postcard please!!.. He is such a star!!, i heard him telling his girlfriend to 'shut up Babe' when he was on the phone to me,this is the 'Babe' whose house he lives in, she works all day driving huge lorries around Wales, while he stays in Bed,(claiming benefits, falsely as a single person,you can't get benefits in U.K if you live together in a relationship with someone who has a job,,and claiming they are just 'sharing the house',and have no relationship, because he gets extra money to have his rent paid!!!) this is also the man who tried to force me to lie to the authorities so he wouldn't have to pay child support!..in fact he never paid until they took it directly from His employer, last time he worked,TEN years ago!