Unforgiveness and M.o.t's

Finally got the car back yesterday,passed the m.o.t at last, watched an interesting programme today on the Revelation t.v about breaking curses in the family generations, which convicted me about thinking that i am going to suffer from the same diseases as my parents and grandparents, because the generational curses have been broken over me and my children, grandchildren and nieces, sister too.
My Dad has suffered from heart problems,but i don't know if the breaking extends to him,i wish it did, also to my half brother Dan too,i suppose i can pray for them to be broken. Don't know if it is legal to do it though and the enemy of our soul is a stickler for legality, i should pray about it.
One of the women was talking about feeling angry with her father, because he was very authoritarian, it struck a chord with me because i was feeling unforgiving to him, right up to when my mum died,i don't know if i was just listening and being drawn into my mum and sisters basic hatred and unforgiveness to him, i felt pretty annoyed that he did not want to be in our lives and get to know my kids,i wrote to him and said sorry for losing my temper about that when i first got saved,( i had said i did not want to have anything to do with him when he said he did not want to be in our lives)
I suppose it was a release for me when Mark said he had never thought my Dad was such a bad guy,such a revelation!!!..Quite strange to be someones daughter again,as a mum and Nan!..God knows! Praise Him!!

Bad dreams and doors

Ben has been having bad dreams, which may have co-incided with the door opening thing,so just to be extra sure i have read the book of Nahum in the house, which is the book in the bible for spiritual warfare.God is good and He always protects us! The meeting went well on Saturday,so we went to church on Sunday and Darren accused Mike of something inappropriate with a young girl!!!.., so they have fallen out again, very disappointing, don't feel i should  intervene, so will let them get on with it. Very cold here last few days, going to get colder too!!!

prayers and gardening

Oh dear feeling ill again today,trying not to let it get me down,the sun is shining,and its cold!...was being sick last night, so feel very weak today. yesterday was a good day i did two hours in the garden, and Mike just turned up, something he has not done for quite a few weeks, so God has things moving again, hope to have prayer meeting here tonight , God willing, maybe Darren will come to, he actually asked me yesterday to pray, i cant remember if i said this already, but his lack off interest in all things of the Kingdom was worrying me,so I felt a nudge from the Lord not to mention anything to him about prayer and Bible study, we prayed for him last Friday night to it was a real answer to pray! Praise God!

Yellow dogs, and near death experiences

No-ones Reading this blog anymore,!.. no views today or yesterday,never mind! maybe i was to conscious of the numbers anyway,at the moment because i am not having much fellowship, i am reading the Bible every day and praying in tongues for 15mins too,( which i should have been doing all the time anyway) i have been doing the tongues for four months now, and its not like me to keep things up very long!!..i was watching the christian channel and someone said about the missionary who went to minister to the triads, cant remember her name,and it inspired me, i felt just a little nudge to do this too,i have read her book, but can only remember the unpleasant 'yellow dog' restaurants. (where they are boiled alive). I think she may have been an Irish woman, and was brought up in such poverty, she had head lice all the time.
I have  tried to avoid the news about the financial situation in this country,i know it probable means the Lord is coming back, soon i hope! I am in fear of what will happen if society breaks down, and i know it is disobedience to God because He took care of the Nation of Israel,in the desert after they left captivity, we have been talking about the End times, for many years, now its possible we could actually be here its a whole different story! Sorry for not trusting you enough Lord.....
Its a sunny day today,it does make me feel better, i spent most of yesterday on the sofa with a bad back, i have pain killers but they make me sleepy,i am not going to allow myself to get discouraged about ll may various health problems,and the difficulties i have just living my life,my untidy and disorganised house.I m in the middle of so may projects, growing seeds for summer, opening up some more borders, so i can grow more things in my garden, getting junk stuff i dont want to throw away into storage in the attic,but having to wait for my daughter to sort out her rubbish in the attic, she has been ill with asthma, my life is very good, and i am so grateful to God for my life, as i have bee on the point of death  at least four times,He gave me visions of heaven,  and i was very annoyed to be sent back! But the Lord had a plan for my life,and if i had died at nineteen none of my wonderful children would have been born, but i am not scared of death, i know where i am going!!! 'to live is Christ, to die is gain'

Monkeys and teenagers

I spoke to Darren's friend in London today, 'J',she is a lovely christian, and has been in his life as she describes it 'since he was a skinny teenager', so it seems that the Lord has had His hand on Darren for a long time, planning to bring him in to His Kingdom, it gives me a lot of hope, especially at the moment when he wants nothing to do with the things of God.
It was only a few years ago that he and my oldest son Nathan, were ganging up on me saying they did not believe in creation, and that we came from monkeys,Praise the Lord, a month or so ago Nathan told me that he believed that the world was intelligently designed, and was 6 thousand years old!, and Darren is watching the christian channel on t.v and is very keen on Dr Murty, a creation scientist! so they have both done a complete about turn, its very encouraging!!!...( i am not claiming anything to do with this,) Glory to God, always!...

Gym and Loving Father

Last night it all worked out really well, i went to the gym and then to Mikes, we had prayer which really felt like the Lord was there, and Luke joined in for the last few minutes.The Enemy is annoying me at the moment, when we went to bed Ben's bedroom door was open,and also this morning,he always keeps it firmly shut,I have prayed, so should not happen again.
We have had a lot of what the un-saved world would call 'ghost sightings' in my house,so i have to keep very vigilant,of course they are not ghosts,but demonic,and the Lord always puts a stop to it when i ask Him, he is a loving Father.I have the spiritual gift of discernment of spirits. The Lords choice for me of course, although at first i wanted a gift like healing, but He always knows better.
We have had 'shadow men', things being thrown across room,so called' poltergiest'  t.v turning it self over,most of the unpleasant things the Enemy has to offer in that context.God bless you,everyone who reads this.

Battery and consquences

I have got the C.D.its wonderful! Praise the Lord, spoke to Elizabeth (one of the wonderful old ladies i have known for a while).She told me that one of the most prominent Christian campaigners in Britain has remarried, contrary to the Bible,i researched him afterwards, and his ex-wife was quoted in the daily mail, saying that he had been violent to her and their children,she ran away and he is re-marrying a Kenyan woman,Stephen Green was on of my hero's, really really disappointing, i feel like i did when i found out that Martin Luther King was reportedly an Adulterer, very sad.
Remarriage is not allowed in the Bible,when i was first saved i did re-marry too,and i was advised by my Pastor not to do it, but i was rebellious,and determined to do what i want!...The Pastor Frank said 'there will be consquences' and he was so right, i am still paying for that mistake now,with the Ex hanging around.
So i suppose i was disappointed to see a mature Christian do it,of course the alleged violence was what shocked , and saddened me.
I was even thinking of writing to his wife, could not find her address though.I am waiting to see what the Lord wants me to do tonight, i don't really want to use one of the few hours i have off a week (from Ben) praying with Mike when i can do that at any time in the week, and its just me and Mike, Darren does not want to come, or Mikes house mate who has just become a Christian.
I want to go to the Gym. In a way its my own selfish fault because i wanted to have it back to how it used to be for about two years,of us going to mikes,every Friday.Which he was worried about my Ex coming round, and i was told not to get him in the middle of this,so i stopped going round on the Fridays.